August 09, 2006
Just to upset Cindy a little. But don't worry, the motherfuckin snakes on the other motherfuckin truck were ok.
Moody gardens is defenitely cool. I still think the penguin scratcher lady has a great job. Those penguins milling about the wreck were pretty damn cool.
Penguin scratcher:
BTW, that lady was scratching the penguin in Monterey not galveston.
Tina made me clarify that.
If I were a penguin, I don't think I'd want her scratching my monterey.
"A truck driver is transporting penguins to the local zoo. His truck breaks down and another truck stops to help him. The first trucker asks the second trucker if he could take the penguins to the zoo for him. The second trucker says, sure no problem. THe first trucker sets to the task of fixing his truck and just when he's about done, he sees the second trucker walking down the road followed by the penguins. 'Hey, why do you still have those penguins, you were supposed to take them to the zoo!' 'Well I did and they had so much fun that now I'm taking them to the movies!' "
A vacationing penguin is driving through Arizona when he notices that the oil-pressure light is on. He gets out to look and sees oil dripping out of the motor. He drives to the nearest town and stops at the first gas station.
After dropping the car off, the penguin goes for a walk around town. He sees an ice-cream shop and, being a penguin in Arizona, decides that something cold would really hit the spot. He gets a big bowl of vanilla ice cream and sits down to eat. Having no hands, he makes a real mess trying to eat with his little flippers.
After finishing his ice cream, he goes back to the gas station and asks the mechanic if he’s found the problem. The mechanic looks up and says, “It looks like you blew a seal.”
“No, no,” the penguin replies, “it’s just ice cream.“
Bad penguin jokes. An excerpt:
The Seven Dwarfs are on a vacation in Europe and receive an audience with the Pope. As the oldest, Dopey serves as spokesman for his mates.
Standing before the Pope, Dopey asks, "Your excellency, are there any dwarf nuns in Vatican City?"
The Pope thinks for a moment and says, "No, Dopey, there are no dwarf nuns in Vatican City." This makes the other six dwarfs snicker.
Dopey then asks, "Mr. Pope, are there any dwarf nuns in Europe?"
"No," the Pope responds. "There are no dwarf nuns in Europe."
Hearing this, the other six dwarfs fall to the floor, laughing and howling.
Dopey looks at the Pope and says, "Sir, are there any dwarf nuns in the world?"
"No, my son," the Pope says. "There are no dwarf nuns anywhere in the world."
With this, the other six dwarfs began chanting, "Dopey made love to a penguin! Dopey made love to a penguin!"
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Not to spoil your fun, but I learned about this yesterday from this article. The only upside to this situation is that the surviving penguins look damn cute milling around the wreckage.
Also, the place where the truck was heading, Moody Gardens, is an awesome spot to view penguins. (See my flickr account)
posted by NanoCindy at 10:15AM CST on August 09